Love versus attachment

Love is trust. Trust takes years to build up and seconds to be destroyed. Love is to accept the other person no matter what. Be there in moments of difficulty. When things get complicated it's easy to run away. Love is commitment.

Attachment is needy and clingy. You want the other person to transform into an ideal. You want your relationship to be like a movie. Attachment is jealous and controlling. Attachment is unhealthy. Attachment is a roller-coaster of emotions.

Love without attachment is almost impossible if you are not a monk living in solitude. When you love someone, you become attached to a certain degree. If you love someone, you can't just let the person go away without feeling abandoned. If you can do it, you are cold as ice. Or a monk.

Relationships are difficult. When you grow up, you begin to see the flaws of other people's relationships—that's the easy part. But other people will point out your flaws—that's harder to recognize. If you felt abandoned as a child, you'll live with the fear of someone abandoning you again. You'll try to overcompensate the fear of rejection by making the first move in your relationships. Even if the other person wasn't going to abandon you, you'll move first. This shows insecurity and fear.

You need to accept that people come and go. Life is a long journey, sometimes you walk accompanied because you find a partner walking towards the same goal as you. Which is and feels awesome. But along the way, people may change the destination, and it will be inconsiderate to pretend the other one to come with you or vice versa. If you love, let walk freely.

Hi, I'm Erik, an engineer from Barcelona. If you like the post or have any comments, say hi.